It Can't Be

This is why I plan and dream about my escape,

This feeling, this pain and frustration.

I go from a perfect bliss, full of happiness and dreams,

To a deep pit of despair.

It’s not me, it can’t be.

I try to keep to my truth.

Stay strong, but then things happen and I get pulled down.

Are other people this way?

Do they feel this darkness?

Or am I again different, wrong.

How come, when I get into a situation, I make the wrong choices?

Am I broken?

Or just misplaced?

Was I put here in the wrong place, or was this place built wrong?

It's not me, it can't be.

I don't choose to be this way, honest and open.

I try to hide, to hide the way I feel, who I truly think I am.

And yet here I am, once again dreaming about my escape.